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Follow up re Bully Proofing Your Child:

Previously, Connie Palmer presented Bully Proofing Your Child (see below) with an approach that is not in general practice, but can be.  The article below, entitled, Bully Proof Your Child, highlights the problem and the methodology that effectively transforms victims of bullying to confident, self advocates known as Bullies to Buddies

If you were not able to attend the program and you would like more information about this approach you can go to   

New legislation and anti-bullying laws will require schools to head up this problem and implement real anti-bullying curriculums in their districts.  However, not all anti-bullying curriculums are created equal, nor are there any necessary requirements or criteria to oversee such a curriculum.  

As parents, if you would like to see Bullies to Buddies adopted and successfully applied into your school district, you need to make your voices heard.  Go to your Board of Education meetings and speak up.  Write letters and emails to your decision making administrators.  The problem of bullying can be corrected and it starts with one child at a time.

Ms. Palmer is also available to meet with administrators, superintendents, faculties, staff, parent groups, PTA's and PTO's to explain and answer any questions anyone may have or how to get started.  Inquiries for Ms. Palmer should call 908.528.2807 or email, .

Bully Proof Your Child                  

Sticks and Stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me……

 Each day, 10-year-old Seth asked his mom for more and more lunch money. Yet he seemed skinnier than ever and came home from school hungry. It turned out that Seth was handing his lunch money to a fifth-grader, who was threatening to beat him up if he didn't pay.

Kayla, 13, thought things were going well at her new school, since all the popular girls were being so nice to her. But then she found out that one of them had posted mean rumors about her on a website. Kayla cried herself to sleep that night and started going to the nurse's office complaining of a stomachache to avoid the girls in study hall.

Unfortunately, the kind of bullying that Seth and Kayla experienced is widespread. In national surveys, most kids and teens say that bullying happens at school.  Alarmingly, and for teens in particular, cyber-bullying, harassment, stalking, spying, sexting and sexual predation has reached dangerous levels through out the country, resulting in new anti bullying legislation.  

It's obvious that current methods, no matter how much many adults and administrators may want to indulge in, which include punishment, punishment, punishment, just DO NOT work!

Bully Proofing 101

Connie Palmer, LCSW, an experienced teacher, therapist, and school counselor presents a new approach to bullying:  Bully Proofing Your Child.  Most anti-bullying curriculum puts the focus on getting the bully to change and doesn’t empower the victims of bullying  to learn ways to solve the problem.  

The approach presented at this CHILD sponsored program, which was featured on CHILD’s website during our Live Conference Series, is based on the brilliant work of psychologist Izzy Kalman, who created a curriculum called Bullies to Buddies, (  The program is a social skills approach that is based not on punishing bullies, but on helping victims learn ways to respond, which quickly reduces the bullying and leaves the child empowered, no longer a helpless victim reliant on adults to solve their problems. 

The program will:

      Help parents and teachers learn how to effectively support their child/student if they are 

         being bullied

     Explore parenting and teaching methods that help “bully proof” your child/student

     • Teach parents and teachers simple responses that will dramatically reduce aggression

        between kids at home or in the classroom, while increasing their resilience, independence 

        and emotional maturity.

 Ms. Palmer is Certified as a Bullies to Buddies trainer.

This FREE program has been part of the regular monthly programming sponsored by The CHILD Organization of Scotch Plains Fanwood.